Dearest Kevin -
You make little sense.
1. You say "Yes, your little guy is cute. For now. Soon he'll grow up to look just like his dad (there's still time and gentics that say he can grow out of it - one can only hope)" Jeez, if that's the case for my kids, what hope do yours have?
2. You say the person "shouts out threats and taunts, all the while hiding behind his friends, who then pummel you even after you cough up your milk money. In this case, your human armor is... your five year old son." uhhh, I don't see where I am hiding behind my son. I am simply posting a simple fact that he can kick your ass.
3. You say "nor am I some overgrown ex-jock who feels the need to somehow compensate for my age by doing these crazy competions and better yet, beating his friends in doing so" yet in the next breath say "See you at the starting line about a steak dinner?" Interesting, to hear this from someone who has been egging on everyone he can find to bet a steak dinner. Something to prove, sir?