Wednesday, January 31, 2007

All this drinking, tsk tsk....

All of you should try living a clean, healthy, athletic-minded lifestyle like me, i.e. foregoing the booze. Yep, haven't had a drink yet today, and it's done wonders.

And Carolyn, Carolyn, don’t listen to these namby-pamby boy wonders advising you to “take it slow” and “don’t push yourself” and all that other claptrap. Life is not for the half-assed and timid. If you’re going to Montana to ski, and you insist on taking to the slopes rather than following my “ski bunny” methodology, well then, you should do it right, after taking advantage of the "private lesson" part of it. It’s just as easy to ski down a mountain as it is a wee hill. Here I am in my own extreme skiing adventure:

Nothing to it. And at least you’ll have the satisfaction of knowing that if/when you go tumbling down the mountain, you’ll look damn fine doing it in your spiffy new ski attire.

And Max, what is this “old” garbage – at 25? If the lumbago ever stops acting up, I might just have to beat the crap out of you for making those kinds of incendiary and outlandish statements.